Heroes: Everything That Rises
16 hours ago
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Hypatia
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Mormonism
One Year Anniversary
So my husband and I were discussing that this is the month of our one year anniversary of NOT attending church. Although I did stop a month or so before he did... because he had a calling and would actually show up to do it.
But yes. It was the month of May where we finally stopped going altogether. We haven't been back since. And we have no desire to return.
That hasn't stopped my visiting teachers however. I still get myriad phone calls, messages, gifts, etc. One time, I was approached about visiting teaching at my job (I work at a library). But yeah, I don't know what to say or do. I'm thinking about writing them an email and just asking them to stop contacting me.
The trouble is they are very nice people after all. Just trying to do their best as they try to navigate this freaked up religion as best they know how. After all, their salvation is contingent upon mine.
I just want to put this behind me. It is difficult though when I get little presents at my door which include messages from leaders in the church, past and present, that talk about how scripture study is the best thing ever. How do you drop the VTs?
Suggestions and ideas would be most appreciated. I would like to do something that doesn't involve me going on a tirade about the church to them.
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9 comments:
How do you drop the VTs?
You can probably find a nicer way to say this (I'm not known for my tact):
"Dear VTs, If you report, in any way, your phone calls, gifts, visits with me to a church leader I ask you to stop the calls, gifts, and visits, because reporting is not a sign of friendship. Love Hypatia".
hahahahahaha!
Brilliant.
I always thought that was odd myself. Even as an active member. Visiting teaching seemed like the time of the month where you had to pretend to be someone's "friend."
Congrats on the anniversary. My hometeachers and visiting teachers quit coming when I resigned but if you are not ready to do that just don't answer the door or phone?! Such a tough position to be in. They are usually really nice, but their goal i to get you back...Good luck!
Yeah... not quite ready to resign... Mainly out of family issues.
However, I have been tempted to just get my name off the membership lists. But I'm paranoid that my folks would find out sooner or later.
I don't answer the phone, but still I feel bad that they waste so much time with me. And it's getting to the point where if this were any other situation, someone would consider it stalking. I don't know how they can't take a hint. Well, I guess I do know. They probably think they aren't trying hard enough. And won't stop...
I'm really considering writing them an email to stop. bleh.
Congrats!!!
It's kind of funny how people view the difference between inactivity and resigning, and yet when it comes down to it, nothing really changes inside you!
The best approach I can think of would be go directly to the bishop and request that you no longer receive official visits from the Church. I suspect as far as your visiting teachers will know, they'll just be reassigned, or simply have you removed from their list.
That way you spare their feelings, and hopefully they can go on their way, thinking that they did their best with you. Win/Win all around!
A toast to Marcus and Hypatia!
*Sips some coffee*
We've got the same issue, and I think we're going to have to write a letter and have our records removed. Although one thing that has worked, is everytime I do get a visit from HT or missionaries I do take a moment to explain some bits of history I think every member should know. Basically I give them the run down on all the reasons why we left. Some of the members don't ever come back after that.
Good to hear from you guys
Koda,
That is a great idea! I just may do that. Or make my hubby do that for me. hahahahaha :/
And it would be a good way for them to not realize that I really did not want them contacting me at all.
Lost Sheep,
Hope the coffee was yummy! I had a yummy one too this morning (OMG we are such rebels). I would love to share tidbits with them about church history. But they would probably just dismiss it as anti-mormon. People just like their comfort zones too much.
And thanks!
Ugh. I need to do something soon. They tried calling me again today. Blahahahajaldhjkfhalkdjfhalkdjh
Make a little "Zen Tract" to give them in return -- make it very Hypatia edited to express your view. Keep it simple but make it clear that you are beyond dogmatic hope BUT that you love friendship.
Maybe that would help a few.
Just an idea
What kind of Church did you attend?
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